Twilight Saga: Eclipse - 2010

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse - 2010

Out of all the Twilight movies this one has to be my favorite.  It’s not what I’d call a good movie but at least it’s better constructed than the other ones.  Eclipse begins with a horror atmosphere as some unlucky unnamed character gets attacked by an invisible assailant on an abandoned dock after dark while it’s raining buckets.  Yeah the dark and stormy night backdrop is overplayed and cliché but you’ll never hear me complain that someone has added a little Kool-Aid to Twilight’s sugary water.  In a transition reminiscent of those in the book the scene goes from dark and stormy to bright sunny and flowery as Bella and Edward are lying in a grassy field talking (or arguing?) about getting married and we’re reminded exactly what kind of movie we’re watching.  Unlike the other Twilight movies, and to an extent the books, this movie has something at least vaguely resembling a plot which makes it a lot more watchable despite the fact that it still contains some of the worst actors, characters, and dialogue in cinema history.

Like I said this movie actually has a plot but even that gets interrupted for the romance and conflict between Bella, Edward, and Jacob.  It also makes room for the backstories of characters I’m sure not even the fans cared about.  I always thought it was odd that they included these backstories even though they aren’t relevant to the plot or even the characters narrating them and only slow things down but they were in the book so I guess they thought they needed to be in the movie.  Well at least we get a better idea of who the werewolves are and why and how they change… NO WAIT WE DON’T!  The only explanation the viewer is given is that they’re native americans and native americans are a very magical and spiritual people.  This flimsy excuse bothers me but I suppose it’d bother me even more if I was native American. 

I’m not sure if I’m the first person to pick up on this but “Eclipse” is loaded with sexual tension and undertones.  I may have been the last person on earth to find out Stephenie Meyer is a Mormon and her values made their way into her books.  Jacob forces himself on Bella all throughout the movie and when that fails resorts to emotional psychological tactics.  He even says she doesn’t know what she wants (apparently he does) and she’s in love with him she just doesn’t know it yet (which is something he proves to her in the book… by forcing himself on her).  Bella forces herself upon an unwilling Edward all but saying if you really loved me you’d put out and against the instincts of every straight man alive or undead refuses her.  Meanwhile Edward refuses to change Bella into a vampire or have sex with her until they get married.  My personal favorite scene is where Bella’s father Charlie tries to have “the talk” with her.

The movie climaxes with an all-out war between the vampires and werewolves.  The effects are kinda bad and you’re constantly reminded that the wolves are nothing more than pixelated cartoons and the vampires tend to break apart easier than the cheapest plastic action figure.

The love triangle is overplayed.  The characters are dull at the best of times and deplorable at the worst.   The performances aren’t much better.   Since the movie tends to reveal more about the plot it takes away the mystery of who’s causing the attacks and raising the vampire army.  Even in the face of all its flaws “Eclipse” isn’t as much of a disaster as the other installments in the series.  68/100 almost passable as a movie but not quite.  Good try though.